Tuesday, September 24, 2013

37 Weeks

Hooray!  Less than 2 weeks left!  Yesterday was my 37 week mark, and I went to the doctor and scheduled my C-Section!  I'm having Mia on October 7th at 1pm.  YAY!  I'm so so excited that it's so soon!  

Ever wonder why I'm always wearing horizontal striped shirts in all my maternity pictures?  Here's the answer:  I have no idea.  Apparently I love all the stripey shirts.  Oh well.  

Anyway, there's really nothing new to report other than my delivery date!  

And I'll leave you with this picture of my darling girl, who got her first princess dress-up last weekend:

She loves it.  And I love her!

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Disney Princess

Lex is a movie watcher.  She's also a big time book reader.  I happen to have quite the collection of Disney movies and books-- the majority of which were purchased before I was even married.  This girl LOVES her Disney movies and books.  In the past month, she's become enamored with all the Disney princesses.  Seriously-- she loves them all.  Since she's just working on learning new words, her cute little voice and the way she pronounces their names just kills me.  I wanted to document now how she says their names before she gets big enough to say them correctly!

Cinderella:  Ella
Aurora:  Awo-wah
Pocahontas:  Cona {I have no idea how this one came about... weird}
Belle:  Bawl
Rapunzel:  Apeenah
Jasmine:  Shashee
Tiana:  Ana
Ariel:  Aya
Eric (because she loves the boys as much or more than the girls):  Ucka {another weird pronunciation, I know!}
Snow White:  Gool {meaning "girl."  For some reason, she hasn't ever said her actual name}

That's all I can think of at the moment.  I love my little girl SO much, and she's seriously in the most fun stage right now.  I love hearing her tiny voice ask for "Hep!" {help} when she needs something, or tell me she got "Huwt" when she bonks her head or something.  She's adorable.  I'm obsessed.

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

36 Weeks.... My Wall

I am 36 weeks pregnant.  I am fat.  I have hit my wall.

This has been an incredibly easy pregnancy.  The easiest.  I've felt great, I've been happy, it's been awesome.

Somehow, seemingly overnight, I'm suddenly ready to be done.  I'm super uncomfortable.  I'm ready to be skinny.  I'm exhausted.

Then I think about actually having a second child and I panic a little.  I adore my Lexsi, and most of the time we get along famously.  But what about those days when she gives me a serious run for my money?  What am I going to do if she's throwing fits and Mia is hungry and crying and I'm just one person?  How do I take care of two little girls at once?  And I do mean little.  Less than 20 months apart is CLOSE.  I must be crazy, right?

And yet, in the same moment, I'm already looking forward to having more kids.  I'm out of control.

At the doctor yesterday, we discussed pros and cons of a C-Section versus a VBAC.  I found out the chances of me actually having a successful VBAC are only 30%.  And that would be if I went into labor by my due date and Mia was little.  BUT... that's not likely.  She's suddenly estimated to be a whole POUND bigger than she was just a week ago (she's up to a little over 6 pounds now), and I'm still not dilated.  So by the time I actually ever went into labor on my own (which, somehow, I can't imagine happening earlier than like 41 weeks?) she'd be a fatty and wouldn't make it past my tailbone anyway.  DJ and I decided it was just best to go with a C-Section again.  It's good and bad.  I'm glad I can just schedule it and be done {October 7th is likely the day-- I'll schedule it next Monday!}, and I'm glad I don't have to worry about labor.  And pushing.  And all that yuckiness.  Just one little incision and I'm good to go.    I suppose I can't really worry about the number of kids I'll be able to have, cause I have no idea.  Some people can have 3 C-Sections, some can have 10.  It's frustrating to me that my body gives me such issues.  First, it took nearly 2 years for me to even get pregnant with Lex.  Then I have to have C-Sections cause I have a big tail bone... what the?  If I had just had a C-Section cause she was big or something, I could totally do a VBAC and have a 90% chance of success.  But my weirdo tailbone throws a wrench in things.  Oh well, what can you really do but put a smile on and be grateful for these little girls Heavenly Father is blessing me with?

And now.  Let's talk about being fat for a minute.  When I got pregnant with Mia, I was about 15 pounds heavier than I was when I got pregnant with Lexsi.  I've gained less weight this time around, but I'm to the point where I weigh more than I ever have in my life.  Scary.  The thing is, I still totally fit into my pre-pregnancy jeans.  I'm just barely getting to the point that I have to stop wearing non-maternity shirts cause my stomach is too big.  I think a good amount of the weight is water weight-- in the past week I've noticed my feet and hands feel swollen.  And look it, along with my face.  So hopefully that just comes off quickly.  I'm totally prepared with my workout regime for as soon as I can work out.  Oh, working out after a C-Section... it's ridiculous how little you can do after your abdomen has been cut open.  Haha!

Just for kicks, I decided to compare what I looked like with Lex and Mia at the same point:

Pretty much the same, I think.  So the fact that I weigh more this time doesn't REALLY matter, I suppose-- I'll work and get skinny again regardless.  No need to stress over a number, right?

All in all, life is good.  I'm just grateful I have less than 3 weeks of this pregnancy left!

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Lessons From Ogden

This post has been a long time coming.  I've been living in Ogden for a month and a half now, and I think I'm finally in a good enough place to write it.  Had I written it 6 weeks ago... it wouldn't have been very nice.

Lesson #1:  A rental is just a rental.  No need to get worked up over it.

Originally, DJ and I were planning on buying a house this summer up here.  However, we ended up deciding that renting for a year would be in our best interest so we could get to know the area better and decide where we wanted to live for sure.  Over the course of the summer when we were in Lovell, I basically stalked the KSL home rental page for good houses.  There were a few new houses for rent that I really loved, but then one day this one came up on the website.  It's 1500 square feet, $300 cheaper than others we were looking at, and only 1 mile from the high school.  It was pretty much a no-brainer for us-- we wanted this house.  We prayed about it and it felt right, so we got under contract without ever having seen it in person.

The day we came up to get the keys and pay our first month's rent was not awesome.  We had just driven back to Utah from Lovell the day before in separate cars, on the way to Ogden to get the keys we got rear-ended (by a cop!-- another story, another day), it was hot, I was a little freaked out cause we had driven through downtown Ogden and it seemed SOOOOOO ghetto (in my defense, I had just moved from Lovell, so... it's way different), and things were just not going super well.  Also remember, I had just sold my brand new house which I got to have finished exactly how I wanted.  I'm used to really nice stuff.  When we walked in the house I nearly died-- the carpets had just been cleaned that morning, so it smelled weird and was super muggy.  Everything just seemed so dirty and dingy.  After walking through the whole house, I melted down.  I did NOT want to live here.  I was panicked because I had already paid my deposit and first month's rent and signed a contract.  Also we had already rented the moving truck to get everything loaded later that day.  I knew I was stuck.  We headed back to my parents' house in Provo and I felt completely defeated.

The next morning I got up early and made the trip to the new house by myself so I could get it cleaned up.  I bleached every surface in the house except the carpet.  I opened all the windows (which, by the way, don't have screens-- super classy) to air it out.  By the time DJ, my dad and brother got here with the moving truck I was feeling slightly better about my life.  The head football coach from BLHS came with a bunch of the football players to help us unload the moving truck.  It was a tad overwhelming to see all my stuff piled around in boxes in a space that was significantly smaller than my last house.  Over the next week I worked on getting order in my life, and I calmed down a little about the fact that I was living here.

Now-- 6 weeks later-- my attitude is better.  I still don't love the house.  It's old.  It's a granny house.  I would NEVER buy it or anything like it.  BUT-- it's a rental.  I only have 10 more months in it.  And because the rent is so cheap, I can save extra money for the down payment on my next house.  It's worth it to me to live in something old for a year so I can afford a brand new house that I really love next summer.

Lesson #2:  Different doesn't mean worse

The demographic here is very different than anything I've lived in before.  Lets be honest... I lived in Utah County for 13 years before moving up here.  I've become sheltered.  After living here for about a week, I took Lex up to a splash pad and when I looked around I realized I was the only white mom there, and the only one without tattoos.  I didn't feel uncomfortable about this.  The other moms were nice and I talked to some of them and it wasn't a big deal-- just different.  I used to take Lex to the splash pad in Springville all the time and it was crowded with white Mormon moms.  That's cool too.  It's just different.

I had to go to the post office to fill out a change of address form and the lady in front of me in line was homeless, and was also doing a change of address form.  I had no idea that was even something you would do if you were homeless-- I guess your mail can be sent to a shelter?  It makes sense that people on government assistance need somewhere to have their stuff sent to.  I just never ever considered it before.

When I see someone with a baby who looks like they're still a teenager, I have to remind myself-- they probably are.  Unfortunately, it happens around here way too much.  I took Lex to lots of football practices during the summer and there were often girls there with their little babies and they were there to watch their boyfriends practice.  It's sad and obviously it's not a good situation or something I agree with or condone, but it doesn't mean these are bad people.  There are so many people here who just need a good support system.

Going to football games up here, I hear WAY more bad language than I ever did at Spanish Fork.  The interesting thing is, though-- it's just as much from the parents as the kids.  It's just a very different community here than the one I came from.  There are a lot of good people around, they just don't have the same background that I do, and that's okay.

Lesson #3:  Your ward is your family

Let's be serious... ever since I got married, I've lived close to family.  I didn't have to rely on ward members to be my support system because I had parents and siblings living close to me.  I never really made an effort to make friends, cause I just hung out with DJ's siblings.  Moving up here changed that.  I honestly haven't been very outgoing since I met DJ, cause I didn't feel the need to be.  Now I do.  And it is HARD to get back into the bubbly, outgoing phase when you've been out of it for 4 years.  Seriously-- when I needed to be outgoing in wards before I was married, I just flirted a lot.  It totally worked.  Things are slightly different now... haha!  But I've been blessed to meet some other young moms in my ward and spend some time with them.  Everyone is really nice, it's just hard to get to know people when you only see them for a few minutes on Sundays.  That's why I have to make an effort to do things during the week with them as well.

Lesson #4:  Expect the unexpected

Last winter when DJ was coaching basketball at SF, his team made it to the state playoffs.  I took Lex and went up to watch the games at Weber State.  I watched them play one game against Ben Lomond High School and thought, "Who the heck are they?  I've lived in Utah for 13 years and have never even heard of that school!"  Now, 6 months later, DJ is the JV Football Offensive Coordinator and Head Girl's Basketball Coach for the Ben Lomond Scots.  I never would have seen that coming.  I go to football games and listen to a bagpipe band {which is WAY better than the SF band, for the record}.  My husband wore a kilt for football team pictures.  I was a little shocked when I saw that, honestly.  I go to Ben Lomond High School every day to take DJ lunch and eat with him.  Life just changes in ways you don't expect, and you might as well get used to it!!!

Lesson #5:  You might as well be happy

This phrase started as a joke in my family-- when we moved to Utah, our Young Women leader gave Meggin a slip of paper that said "You might as well be happy," on it, and we thought it was the stupidest thing.  We started saying it to be bratty about stuff, cause it was all just a big joke to us.  The older I've gotten though, the more it's become a real thing to me.  Happiness is a choice.  I can choose to be miserable in my granny house with no family living by me and new situations all around me, or I can choose to be happy.  I choose to be happy.  There is so much good in my life, I'm not going to waste time being negative.  I'm going to focus on the positive, look forward to good things in my future, and enjoy the time I have now with my little family.  Life is pretty simple right now, and I'm going to just relax and enjoy it!

Week 35

Since I've hardly written on my blog about ANYTHING, let alone this pregnancy, I guess I should do updates now that I'm so close to having this little girl.  I was 35 weeks on Monday, and had my doctor appointment.  He checked, and I'm not dilated AT ALL.  Can you believe it?  I've had contractions every day for weeks now.  I honestly don't think I'd ever ever go into labor without drugs.  Crazy.

So even though this is my second baby, I think I'm feeling more anxiety about delivery than I was last time.  I think it's cause I just expected to have a C-section and now I might not be and I just hate not knowing what to expect.  My plan is just to see how big Mia gets and then decide.  I figured I'd probably still have a C-section, cause she'd get too big.  However, at the last appointment, she'd only gained 4 ounces in the course of 2 weeks.  If she stayed growing at that pace, she'd only be about 6 pounds by the time I'm ready to deliver, and then I could try a VBAC.  I just hate the idea of getting induced, going through labor again, pushing and THEN finding out she'll have to come via C-section.  I already did that once, and it's exhausting... I've just been doing lots of praying about how to make the decision, and I'll discuss pros and cons with my doctor and DJ next Monday when we go in again.  I just hate that I even have to decide...

Anyway, that's where I'm at.  Here's my weekly ultrasound pic:

That little fist up by her face kills me.  I can't wait to snuggle her little self!!!

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Sacrament Meeting Score

Sundays are tough.  Our ward meets from 11am-2pm, and Sacrament meeting is last.  Unfortunately, this means Sacrament meeting starts right when Lex would usually be going down for a nap.  This past Sunday I decided to try bringing Lexsi's kitty pillow for her to use during Sacrament to see if she'd just relax and not throw fits.  It totally worked!  She sat and snuggled on DJ's lap with her kitty for the majority of the meeting.  So awesome. So our Bishop was giving a great talk about spiritual apathy, and was comparing it to a scale where on one side is spiritual exaltation and the other is spiritual damnation, with apathy right in the middle.  He put his hands up like this to demonstrate:

{ignore my pj's, lack of makeup, etc. please}

I glanced over at Lexsi, who was half asleep on DJ's lap.  She had her hands up too, and at first I thought it was so cute how she was copying the Bishop.  Then, in her mostly asleep, tired little voice, she started saying, "Touchdown!  Touchdown!"

Good to know she's been taught well.